Miriam Bennett

Memories

I’m sorry.
I’m sorry for the things I’ve done,
The things I’ve said.
I didn’t mean them.
I wish I could erase that moment,
That moment I told you I hated you.
I shouldn’t have said that
Because it was a lie – a complete lie.
But I had my reasons.

You broke my heart
And disappeared out of my life,
Like you were never there.
You dumped me,
And didn’t explain yourself.
But I know why you left me,
Everyone else does too.
I was too young for you,
But only by a few years.
And I would always tell you
That age was just a number,
But you never believed me.
You said people talked about us:
You were too old, I was too young.
But I would say
That in a few years’ time,
Our ages wouldn’t matter,
Only what was in our hearts.

I never wanted to see you again
After what happened between us,
But then you called me out of the blue.
I picked up the phone,
And all I heard was your voice.
You said you wanted to catch up,
And I agreed without hesitation.

The following day, we met in the park.
And then my eyes found yours,
And I felt that spark that could guide me through the dark.
We sat down; I didn’t know what to say.
Then you spoke and took my breath away.
We talked for hours; we laughed, we cried,
We read each others’ mind.
I didn’t want our fun to end.
It felt like nothing had changed.
All guards were down.

I was about to utter those three words
That had been engraved in my mind
Since you called,
But you beat me to it.
Except, you didn’t say the words
I believed you would say.
You said the unexpected:
You were engaged!
As you spoke that last part,
I realized that those were the words
That would break my heart.
I was so angry,
And I didn’t mean to cause a scene;
I yelled,
I cried,
I pleaded.
But then I said the first words that came into my mind,
“I hate you!”
And I’ve regretted it ever since.

I am trying to say that
I’m sorry for any pain I may have caused you.
You were trying to smooth things over,
Make a fresh start,
But I ruined that for both of us.

I just want you to be happy,
And if that means sacrificing my own happiness,
Then so be it.
I’m happy for you,
And I just want you to know that
My feelings for you haven’t changed
Since the first time I saw you:
I love you,
I will always love you.




[TABLE OF CONTENTS, LHS CLASS OF 2010 EDITION]


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